From Uncle Aaron

I had a hard time picking which picture to post of Livi and Aaron. There are quite a few and all too cute. Livi was so fascinated by Aaron. Maybe because he pretended it wasn't a big deal that she payed attention or because he was always funny or because he has this special thing where kids love him. I know I love him. Livi did more than love him. She adored him.


So I've struggled to write a tribute for my neice Alivia. She meant a lot to me, if not everything, and I wasn't sure how I could only write one small paragraph about her that would give anyone who read it the smallest glimpse of how much fun, cute, funny, exciting, and so forth she was and still is to me. Moving on, this past Sunday I had the hiccups for roughly about three hiccups. It was an incredible nuisance to me despite the short duration they lasted. Like so many other things in my everyday life I thought about Alivia. She frequently had the hiccups, and instead of just having three she'd have them for a half hour or so. She'd go about whatever cute thing it was she was doing all the while hiccuping and not caring or even really noticing. Alivia didn't care about her hiccups one bit. Always overjoyed by many things, if you were entertaining which was actually incredibly hard being she was so opiniated and stubborn in the most adorable fashion, she'd continue to laugh and play and bounce everytime one of her little hiccups came out of the cuttest little mouth. I thought "how could someone so small not care about hiccups when I'm entirely bothered by them". Then I thought about how I'm often toubled and saddened about her death, Alivia is the complete opposite. Alivia couldn't be in any better place feeling any better than she does right now each moment getting even more so better by the minute. She isn't bothered that she died and she isnt' saddened or troubled by anything of her illness but she is filled with even more joy than she ever had now than here, even though I'd like to think she could have been happiest with us, since I'm selfish, she's many times over happier now. It's said that heaven is a place where nothing bad or even slightly uncomforting can happen but I know she still has her hiccups there because they weren't uncomfortable or bad here and there not there. They're just her cute little heaven hiccups.

From Uncle Chris

It’s hard to fully express how I fell about losing my niece. There aren’t many words that can explain the emotions I have when I think about her and the kind of person she was.
Alivia was the first niece I ever had. I remember when she was born how I felt so happy and proud that I was the uncle of such a cute little girl. I wondered what she would think of me when she got older and if she would like me or not. As she grew it became apparent that she did like me! It was such a great feeling to know that she knew I was her uncle and that she liked that I was her uncle. Whenever she would make a present for me, like a card with stickers on it or something that she painted, I always felt so proud. She was so aware of other people and she always wanted to help them when she could or share with them something fun.
A memory I have of Alivia that I will never forget was one night when she wanted to play with me in her play closet. She didn’t want anyone else to come in; it was just her and I. We went into the closet and looked at all the little animals on the walls and she would say “oh!” when she would see one that she hadn’t before. I was saying the noises that each animal made and she really liked that. I also pointed to the animals and asked her if it was a rabbit or a bird…ect and she would say “yeah” like it was the most obvious thing ever! She was so smart. Then she rocked back and forth on her little horse and wanted to go faster. She was obviously showing me how good she was at riding the horse and I was impressed. Then she proceeded to close the door on me and I would say, “hey let me outta here!” and she would laugh and open the door for me. Then we would do it all over again. I am so glad I was able to have times like that with her and I will never forget it.

From Uncle William

During Alivia's life her uncle Will took over 2,000 pictures of her. She loved when he took her picture and from you get a little glimpse of how he viewed her.

Alivia was an amazing person, not only to me but to everyone she knew. I remember taking her pictures and how she always understood what was going on. We were near the end of one long photo-shoot where she had gone through many outfit changes and locations and she was on the bed in Da and Mama's room, jumping around and laughing. I was stooped over taking pictures as fast as I could trying to catch every second of it when I noticed I could only take two more pictures. Alivia had lain down on the bed and put her hand under her chin. She knew what she was doing and she couldn't have posed more perfectly. With two pictures left I snapped the shot. That picture reminds me of everything about Alivia. The way she always knew what was happening, tracking with you, understanding you. She would make you laugh and then laugh herself, joining in on her own fun. She was also reserved, she made you prove that you cared, she wouldn't settle for someone she knew wouldn't last, she was wise in that way and I loved her for it. She was alive, even as I type this the spellcheck underlines Alivia, the first "correct" spelling is the word "Alive". She was and is alive more than ever now. I love you Alivia Rachel Haughery. William K.

Light the Night

I don't want anyone to feel any pressure but I am doing a walk (along with James, my parents, brothers-in-law, nurses and friends) that benefits the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society. All proceeds got to research for these details. If anyone wants to sponser us then visit my page at http://www.active.com/donate/ltnHarris/2169_emilyhaughery

You can use a credit card and sponser on-line if you would like. Thanks for considering this. Also businesses that feel like sponsering can do so.

From Pseudo Uncle Jeremy

Baltimore Aquarium with John, Chris, Livi, James, Jeremy (who is an honorary or pseudo uncle) and William


- Well, lets start at the beginning, I remember the first time I saw Livi a couple weeks after she was born. She seemed so delicate and small as all baby's look like when they are born. But what I realized was this was not just a normal little baby, she redefined cuteness. I mean seriously those blue eyes that basically burned a whole into your heart whenever you looked into them (which were rare occasions, as I will explain later). The one thing that most blew me away was Livi's, above average intelligence. She was so freakin smart it was ridicules! So, that point brings me to the best memories of Livi. I think everyone to some extent experienced the "eye contact game" Livi use to play, but I think only a select few got the real full effect of the game. Livi would not look at me in the eyes to save my life, I mean seriously eye contact was not happening between us..haha. I would do EVERYTHING to some how get on her "okay you are qualified to look at me side". I would play with her...talk to her (if she let me haha)...but nothing at all seemed to work. But one day I found a spark of hope. When I had send my graduation photo to James and Emily, Livi took that thing and carried every were around the house, chewed on it and yelled at momma when she tried to take it from her. I thought I had to be on her good side now and surely she would look at me. Yeah, I could take that idea and throw it out the window. First time I saw here after that little photo caring around incident she was so shy and bashful she would not even look out the corner of her eye at me! Well, there went my only hope I was defeated.haha, but it really did not matter because I still loved Livi and loved being around her. She knew what she wanted and were she wanted everything. Livi was particular about every little detail and that made her even more cute. Livi was just being herself. I mean, something has to be special about her if four grown boys (John, Chris, William and I) fight over a little girl's attention. -

I love you Livi and will miss you so much.

Bye for now...

I decided to take a few days off from the tributes to Alivia and pay my respect to the families of two amazing people who lost their battles with leukemia in the last week.

Joe Linn went to be with the Lord on Friday night. He was diagonosed with leukemia over a year ago and went through one transplant and was working towards a second. He and his wife Karen were so positive throughout their whole fight. I was constantly amazed by their joy in the midst of trial. They leaned on each other and on the Lord. They didn't complain or loss hope. Karen and I went to high school together and my mother has worked at her father's doctors office for years. We didn't know each other well but found that this disease we had in commen brought us together. I wept for Karen and Joe many times throughout their long ordeal.

Amy Wilhoite went to be with the Lord yesterday (Monday). Amy is the mother of a sweet one year old. She also went through one transplant and was awaiting another. Her road was very hard and long. I was often encouraged by her words on her blog. She lived with her eyes on heaven and was such an encouragement to me in the hospital when Livi was there. I never met Amy besides on my computer. I was hopeing for a day when I could introduce her to my Livi now I guess my Livi will introduce me to her.

I am glad that they aren't suffering anymore. I am so terribly sad for their families to be left behind. I pray that they will experience much peace, that they will be able to mourn but also remember all the joys, that they will be surrounded by people who just listen and sit with them. YOu are all in my thoughts and prayers. These next few weeks will be a whirlwind and you won't have time to think. I pray that when the activities of the next days or weeks are over that you will be overwhelmed by the Lord. That He will hold you and comfort you as no one else can. Our love to you all...

From Dedad and Nan

From the moment James and Emily walked into our kitchen and threw pink candy on the counter (indicating that they were pregnant with a girl) we were delighted. After raising five sons, we were finally going to have a girl born into the Haughery clan. Alivia opened up a whole new world to us. She was so precious. We loved the times Emily would bring her over to visit in our sunroom. She always dressed her so cute. All prejudice aside, she really was extremely adorable!

One of the first things we noticed about her was her hands. From the day she was born, the way she moved her hands was very distinct. She used them intentionally and with great precision. She was more capable than many adults when handling delicate items like stickers. She would also use her hands to communicate with us. The slight raising of the hand or an open palm at the end of a stiff-arm communicated more clearly than a dozen words.

One of our favorite memories was when we took her Trick or Treating in our neighborhood. Emily dressed her up like a baby chicken and we went door to door. At first she was timid and uncertain but as she warmed up it was precious to see her excitement grow as she anticipated arriving at the doorstep of each new home. In the end she gave us all a warm, happy memory.

Perhaps the thing that stood out the most to us was her relationship with her mom. To many, Alivia was full of life. And she was irresistibly charming, funny and delightful to watch. Those qualities grew quickly because Emily interacted so deeply with her. She regularly opened the doors of social interaction for Alivia and taught her how to relate to others. As a result she became very socially aware.

She interacted with you like she knew just what you were saying (and usually did). It never felt like you were talking with a one year old or a two year old. She noticed every inflection….every detail when you were with her. When she was really looking at something, she would raise her eyebrows….as if to let more of the “thought of it” into her mind. It was so sweet. And you could see how very intelligent she was.

From the very beginning we felt a strong desire to protect her. She was delicate and beautiful. Every part of her we would die for. She could hold a whole room of adults captive in her spell. Our college age sons would do anything for her…..no matter if it made them look goofy. We would dream about what trouble any boy would have trying to date her!! Not only did she have a strong Dad, but also all those uncles to contend with!

There will never be anyone like her. We will always miss her. Until we’re with her in Heaven, we will always miss her.

Love,
Dedaddy and Nan
(Bill and Cynthia)

From Rachel K.

Beautiful Alivia – this is not something I ever expected to write – not something that once crossed my mind.
I remember when you were a baby - sitting in your back yard on a blanket as your mom & I priced funny clothes for a yard sale. You played and rolled around and we made faces at you and did silly things to make you smile. It was fun to watch you eat and play because every move was so dainty and thoughtful. When Steph’s crazy puppy Stella came to visit, you watched with fascination as the dog scrambled through the house. You didn’t like messy things, but you sure did want to touch the puppy. You loved your kitchen set and making Pa and Da become your servants for endless meals. You were born to delegate and your sweet nature made everyone comply.
Usually one of a child’s first words is Mama. Not for you though. We knew you could say it, but you deliberately wouldn’t. When you wanted your mom’s attention you had an unspoken look or a certain kind of cry to let her know you needed her. You reserved a special language for her and I think you were just like your mom, iron-willed with a complex personality. In other moments, you were strong and quiet, like your dad.
As we stood at your tiny casket and felt the finality of it all, I was ever more grateful that your family graciously allowed me to be a part of those miraculous first moments.
I’m not going to lie and say that I feel it is a blessing that you died. You deserved to fully experience all that a loving family and a big wide world has to offer. Your mom was so diligent and your dad worked so hard to bring you home. You fought so hard and I’m so proud of you. It’s a bigger plan than we can comprehend so just know that we miss you. It is a blessing that you no longer suffer and you are in a better place. I am angry and sad that you had to endure that struggle, but I hope you will somehow know how much your life has impacted so many.
I’m leaving you with this letter that I wrote to you awhile ago and hoped you would open on your 10th Birthday. I hope you don’t mind that I share it. It reminds me of a happy time – a day that started off with a dance party.

Happy Birthday my darling Alivia! It’s hard to believe you’re 10 now! 10 is a great age to be. You are old enough for responsibility but you can still have lots of fun. What’s harder to believe is that as I write this letter, you haven’t even turned 1 yet! It’s September 10, 2005 and tomorrow is your church dedication. I’m on my way to Lancaster this afternoon!
I just wanted to leave you a special note to let you know how much you are loved. I was lucky enough to watch you come into the world – and it was amazing! Before you were even in your mom’s belly, your parents loved you – wondering what your personality would be like and what you would look like. I wondered too, especially when your mom was as big as a house  Knowing your parents, you probably have brothers and sisters by now. I am the oldest too, so I know that you will help your mom & dad a lot and love your brothers and sisters even when they make you mad.
I hope you will always use your brain and your heart. Be happy with who you are and remember whose you are!
I’ll be there for your dedication and I can’t wait to know you when you’re 10. I’ll be there all along the way.
Love you,
Rachel

From Erin W.

Livi

I dream about Livi often, the dreams are always good, but always a little bitter sweet, waking up in reality and knowing my little friend is not hear today and won’t be tomorrow either. But those dreams cause me to be happy about the times I got to spend with Livi, and James and Emily.

I really got one of the best deals because about this time last year, I moved in to the Haughery’s house to live with them for a couple months. The first day I was there I sat in a chair in the living room, Livi was at her usual spot playing with her toys on the coffee table and she completely ignored me. For about a week any time I came into the room and did not sit in that chair, she would point at me and shake her hand, and “uh-uh, no” until I moved over to the chair (Emily would kindly tell Livi that, “Erin can sit where she wants to”). I finally I broke the routine, and Livi and I became fast friends. You could find us reading books together about farm animals, playing with her little dolls, dancing in her room, she even would let me hold and carry her sometimes – a very rare special treat because if you were not momma or da, it did not always happen. She was so particular, always knew exactly what she wanted, and defiantly a leader, not a follower and once you met Livi and fell in love with her you want to follow her.

One of favorite times at the Haughery’s was dinnertime, Livi would eat earlier and often Emily and I would wait to eat with James when he came home from work. We would eat in the living room to be with Livi, James would sit on the couch and Emily and I would sit cross-legged on the floor at the coffee table. Livi would walk back and fourth between Emily and I sitting on our laps and telling us what to eat off our plates or to take a drink. She was never annoying, always cute and just wanted to help.

The first time I came to visit Livi and Emily (and Pa and Gigi) in the hospital I wondered if Livi would be a little shy. She had not seen me for a little while because I had to wait till the critical germ period was over. The moment I walked in the room she said “En”, and handed me her special white kitty. I was shocked! That was the first time she said my name! It was so cute and funny; Emily and I kept asking her to say my name over and over, and she had this look on her face that just said, “yes, I am cute and funny and I know I am smart”. She handed me the kitty because when I lived with the Haughery’s Livi and I would read books about kitties and I would show her pictures of the two cats at my parents house in Indiana, and we would talk about visiting them together.

There was something just so special and wonderful about her, I think maybe God made her that way because he knew she would not be her long. The way she was brought so much joy to the people around her, and joy to her too. When you were in a room with her, all you wanted was to be near her.

I have such sweet memories of her from home and the hospital. At home she would let me feed her (which usually Emily was the only one allowed), sit by her in the car then by her in her hospital bed.

One time, in May, I remember I came to see Livi and Emily, and Emily was trying to write an email, and Livi needed to take a nap. Sometimes Livi would fall asleep on her own, but most of the time Emily would need to stand by her bed and rub her tummy till she fell asleep. This time Livi kept waking up and would whimper a little. Emily asked her if she would let me rub her tummy, she did and I spent 10 or 15 minutes just gently rubbing her tummy and talking quietly with her till she fell asleep. What a precious moment.

I remember the time in the hospital when Livi was unfortunately quite swollen. Emily and I remarked to each other that she was still cute. When Emily would talk Livi would talk at the same time and say “yea, uh-huh, yeah”. Emily would be talking about the color of the siding on their house or what she had for lunch and Livi would just chime in with “yea, uh-huh, yeah”, and nod her head up and down. So cute and so funny.

James and Emily are a portrait I’ve never seen a double to. They truly are absolutely amazing. James was and is unfailing in his care and love for Emily and Livi. He really would do anything to make life better and more comfortable for them. There are not many who are more kind than him. Emily was stunning in her unfailing care for Livi (out of and in the hospital). She always made life for Livi fun, relaxed, and entertaining. Emily even cared about the other children on the floor, buying them presents (pa and Gigi did that too), painting their doors, praying for them, and more, I am sure, we don’t even know about. It is no wonder Livi was always so happy; she had Emily and James as her parents.

Today, Livi helps me to understand that we were not made for this place, and our lives really our not our own.

I am so happy that I got to be around her and love her here for just a little while, a time that was to short though. Who knew that a year later, this is where we would be? It is so hard for me to understand why she had to die; I still don’t, and as I’ve heard Gigi remark, don’t think I ever will this side of heaven.



I’ll always have a heartache for Livi



Erin

From Beth

I wish I had more words, better words... for Alivia. I don't think there are enough
words in existence to pay proper tribute to the cutest, sweetest, best baby girl.


Livi was the most beautiful, incredible person I have ever met. Alivia was always
full of joy that she never kept to herself but happily shared with her family and
close friends who she loved and who deeply loved her back. It was impossible
not to laugh when Livi laughed... not to smile and sense such joy when I was so
blessed to spend time with her.


I love how she lit up when someone came into the room -
Emily, James, Pa or Gigi... her blue blue eyes sparkled and she
smiled and got so excited. It's not a surprise...Emily and James - you
are incredible. I respect you and love you so very much.


Livi was particular about who she let close to her. When I went to visit James,
Emily and Alivia last summer she let me hang out, but not hold
her or pick her up... those privileges were for Momma, Da, Pa and Gigi. It was
near the Fourth of July, and I was getting ready to leave the next day to go back
home. The night before I left, we went to see fireworks. We got there early and set up
some chairs and blankets to get the best view. Livi was wearing the cutest outfit
(as always) with a little pink sweatshirt to keep warm. She was doing so well that
I decided to try and see one more time if maybe she'd let me hold her. I understood
why if she didn't, but hoped maybe she would be comfortable enough by that time...
Emily was close by and I picked sweet little Alivia up and held her. She let me hold her.
She played with the little sparkles that were sewn on the shoulder of my tshirt. Her little
fingers examining the tiny circles. My heart filled with such a sense of love. As if I
didn't already completely love her - somehow my love for Alivia just kept growing.
It never stopped. It never will.


Love you forever, Livi. Fairy god-mother, Beth